Sleep Cycles and Adulthood

Its odd the way life cycles sometimes. The way you slept as a child is likely how you wish you could sleep as an adult. (How does 8pm bedtime, 7am wake up time and a solid two hour nap during the day sound? Heavenly? Refreshing??)

The sleep you didn't need as a teenager and/or young adult does not continue meeting your required-rest needs as a (much) older adult. Fall asleep at 2am, wake up by 8am - more than enough for the average 19-year old. The average 48-year old?? Not so much. Unless the walking dead look is accepted at your workplace.


This is one of the 1,686,831 reasons that parenting is hard. Bedtimes between children and adults never seem to coincide.

When they're little they fight sleep. They come up with excuses to extend their bedtime and they push and squeeze that number back with every passing year.

And when they're little you just want them to GO TO SLEEP SO YOU CAN WATCH ONE STINKING SHOW BEFORE YOU PASS OUT FROM EXHAUSTION ALREADY!!


As they get older - you are also getting older, so them wanting to stay up to watch a movie or go out with friends or text their girlfriend means you feel obligated to extend your bedtime to make sure they do - in fact - go to bed.

And unfortunately because the world is cruel, staying up this late - even one time - makes you look like that time you had the hangover from hell when you were 22. Except at 20+ years later you didn't need to drink a drop to achieve that look.


Ahhh, such a wicked twist the sleep cycle takes.


At forty-hundred years old, I've become the person who looks the clock and says, "it's already 8 o'clock, we can't start a movie now."

There's really not a great point to this post except to say to young parents - some things get easier as your kids get older, except bedtime. That crap actually becomes more difficult. They just keep wanting to stay up later and later and you just keep having birthdays and NEEDING YOUR STINKING SLEEP ALREADY! Unless you're one of those people who can survive, function and even look great on just over five hours of sleep, in which case - I banish thee from parenting land. There's no place here for your fresh face and great hair.

Go. Go now and save thyself. Before I become sorely tempted to throw my reheated-three-times-over coffee on your perfectly put-together ensemble.


I'm just kidding. You can stay. But hey, as long as you're here, do you mind keeping an eye on the kids while I grab a quick nap?

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