It (already) occurs to me that sometime next school year, after I've started to deal with (the trauma of) my eldest child being away at college - that our High School will then release the yearbook for the current school year.
As in - his senior year.
Meaning a book, of memories, will be handed to me right about the time I've started to reconcile with the whole concept of being a household of four.
A book, reminding me of the days when he was safe and sound and in my home. JUDAS PRIEST, SCHOOL, WHY DON'T YOU JUST POST COPIES OF MY ULTRASOUND PHOTOS AND SEND THEM TO ME AS A BRUTAL REMINDER THAT I CAN NO LONGER KEEP HIM THAT SAFE.
I don't know what it was that made this horrifying realization pop into my head but I'm thinking of starting a petition to the school to wait and release the yearbooks until Christmas break. When he'll be back and he can look at it with us. And we can all sit around the fire and sing Koombiya and songs about chestnuts roasting.
Until one of my boys inevitably changes the song words to sing about some other nuts roasting (probably his own) and we will then disperse from the merriment. This seems like a more natural progression of how yearbook handling should go.
Except maybe the singing about the nuts. In your house, that probably seems perverted or horrid sounding.
But it's all part of the game here.
I'm sorry I took you on this little jaunt down Jess'-nightmarish-glimpse-into-the-future. I can't help myself. I feel like if I have to go there, others should come along.
You can go now. I'll be fine... until August.
That's when the crazy will set in.
What? You thought I was crazy already?
Child of God.... you ain't seen nothing yet.