How Friendship Saves Us from Ourselves

This tale begins with an act of stupidity - as most good lessons often do...

There once was a girl [insert your name here] who, aside from being intelligent most of the time, occasionally made some incredibly stupid decisions. *Screeeech* - cue the movie screeching noise here.


I know what you're thinking, now hold up there young lady we come to this here place to read about you and your clan of misfits. Not to get slandered and called stupid!


Okay first of all - did you just call me "young?" That was so nice of you! And also I didn't call anyone stupid. In fact I said the person in this story is intelligent - but that they sometimes do dumb things.


There's a difference.


Show me a person who will not admit to making stupid choices every now and again and I will show you the biggest idiot in the room - and guess what, we'll be pointing at the same person. Sorry folks, that's the cold, hard truth. You can either admit you've likely done dumb stuff or you can be the goon in denial while everyone else in the room secretly calls you a buffoon.


Now, let's get back to the story. So you're clicking away through each day, for the most part making some pretty good life choices until one day you realize you need new pants. And you hate buying new pants. New pants buying is the worst. You are fairly certain there is no pair of pants in all the shops in the world that was made to fit the type of lower body that you possess and if such a pair exists they likely cost two trillion American dollars. And since buying new pants ranks low on your list of fun-things-to-do, you decide to do this via online shopping so you can have the comfort of your own home for the trying-on-the-pants portion of the shitshow. This decision was sponsored by INTELLIGENT YOU.

Intelligent you; making good decisions to help alleviate some of the pain of yucky tasks.

Intelligent you, however, is about to need a potty break. During at which time, your stupid-decision-making alter ego will slide into your spot with your laptop and proceed to order three pairs of pants - sizing up on all of them because stupid you thinks you're kind of chunky.


Lo and behold, a few magical days later, the pants that stupid you ordered arrive for the trying on portion of the story. At which time intelligent you takes her new purchases into her room where she can turn and twist to see herself at every angle and proceeds to put on each pair... finding that none of them seem to fit perfectly. (Odd, but as you suspected.) So intelligent you packs two of the pairs back into their shipping box to be returned and even though the third pair didn't fit awesomely, you know you need new pants, so you decide it was the least offensive of the evils and keep that pair.


As the story goes, you are cursing yourself two days later when you decide to wear said new pants to work and realize you spent approximately 3.6 hours of your day pulling them into the spot that good pants are supposed to stay in because, thanks to your stupid decision making other half, your pants were actually ordered a size too big.


Luckily this story, like all good stories, has - a side kick. A veritable and verbal ass-kicker who will swoop in to save you from your stupid other self.


Side kick noticed you needed new pants a month ago so side kick purchased a pair of pants she thought would look good on you. Side kick even ordered your actual size since she doesn't walk around thinking you're kind of chunky but sees you just the way you are.


Now as all good stories close, a happy ending is in sight.... since side kick didn't order up a size - the pants she gave to you fit great. Just the way you want them to, actually! (Weird, right?) And now you have a new pair of pants that fit and a new pair of pants to keep and wear and remind yourself to not let stupid-you make any more decisions. (Even though both you and I know that probably and unfortunately will happen again.)


Friends, Roman, Countrymen.... oh wait, wrong rant...


Readers - the moral of this story is that God's grace will be the thing that saves us but he's dropped some people to help save us from our own stupidity while we spend our time here. These people are called YOUR FRIENDS - and you can identify them by the people that take the fourth glass of wine away from you, dump it out, replace it with water and then nudge it back in front of you.

The people that buy you gifts in your actual size.

The people that know your favorite candy and also what food you are allergic to.

The people that your dog never barks at because they know their scent from routine contact...


Those people - they're here to save us from our stupid-decision making selves. Pushing us back into reality with a nod toward the thing-we-should-have-done-in-the-first-place. Let us take away from this rambling two things, thanking God for His grace AND for His wise placement of the people in life you call "friends."


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