Another Form of Distancing

There's another form of distancing happening in my house....


I'm a homebody so one would think this whole social distancing thing wouldn't be that big of a dealio to someone like me.


But that's only because - due to social distancing - one would not be allowed to peer inside my house. (Thank you Jesus for all favors both big and small.)


You see my house is dirty.

And it's not used to being so.


I like to keep my house relatively clean and picked up. And even though I'm actually home more now than I normally would be at this time of year (not working full work hours, not sitting at kids' sporting events,) I. cannot. keep. this. hellhole. clean.


Because even though I am home more - so are they!

They being the heathens that I live with. The heathens that are normally very occupied for many hours of the day with school, practices and doing things with other people in places other than my house.


Social distancing has made these dirtballs I call my children distance themselves from all of the things - including window cleaner (as evidenced by spots on the bathroom mirrors,) Tilex (obvious if you take a dare to open their shower door,) and the household mop.

Last night at 8:30pm, I looked at my floors and thought, holy mother of pearl if I do not clean these floors there will probably be someone knocking on my door tomorrow saying they've come to take my children since my home is clearly not fit for them to live in.

So I mopped.

Not because I didn't want someone to come take my children - on the contrary I would like someone to take them for a few hours so my floors can have a reminder of days far gone when they were clean and remained so for at least two hours - but because I could not stop thinking about the grossness my floors had become since this whole social distancing thing started.


Truly, if someone would have come into my home last night, pre-mopping - they would not have believed that I had exquisitely clean floors 18 days ago - hell, they would not have believed I had ever cleaned my floor once since moving into my house three years ago.

So the hardest part for this homebody is not keeping my distance. Distance is my friend. I like distance. However I also like a clean house - and unfortunately my clean house seems to have decided to keep a respectable distance from us too.

Maybe my clean house went to the neighbors to live?

Maybe there it can get some respect and admiration instead of 48 seconds of gleaming pride followed by days of dust gathering and foot traffic.


I'm going to ride this social distancing thing out. Because I'm supposed to. Because I care enough to do so. But I. am. hoping. (fingers crossed, wishing on stars at night and again in the morning) that when we are no longer required to distance ourselves from things that my clean house returns also.

Home. Where it belongs.

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